STARRPHUK ENT.®

Women's Rape Fantasies: How Common? What Do They Mean? | Psychology Today

2010-07-02T23:39:00.000-04:00

Some women have fantasies of being forced into sex. At first glance, rape fantasies make no sense. Why fantasize about something that in real life would be traumatic, repugnant, and life-threatening?

But on closer examination, such fantasies are not unusual. Many men daydream about getting the girl by rescuing her from a dangerous situation--without the slightest wish to confront armed thugs, or be trapped in a fire on the 23rd floor.

Fantasies allow us to "experience" the outer limits of our imaginations safely, with no risk--and for some people, that includes fantasies of coerced sex. In fantasy everything is permitted and nothing is wrong.

But rape fantasies raise thorny issues. Many women who have them can't shake the feeling that they are abnormal or perverted.

From 1973 through 2008, nine surveys of women's rape fantasies have been published. They show that about four in 10 women admit having them (31 to 57 percent) with a median frequency of about once a month. Actual prevalence of rape fantasies is probably higher because women may not feel comfortable admitting them.

For the latest report (Bivona, J. and J. Critelli. "The Nature of Women's Rape Fantasies: An Analysis of Prevalence, Frequency, and Contents,"Journal of Sex Research (2009) 46:33), psychologists at North Texas University asked 355 college women: How often have you fantasized being overpowered/forced/raped by a man/woman to have oral/vaginal/anal sex against your will?

Sixty-two percent said they'd had at least one such fantasy. But responses varied depending on the terminology used. When asked about being "overpowered by a man," 52 percent said they'd had that fantasy, the situation most typically depicted in women's romance fiction. But when the term was "rape," only 32 percent said they'd had the fantasy. These findings are in the same ballpark as previous reports.

Frequency of rape fantasies varied substantially. Thirty-eight percent of respondents never had them. Of those who did, 25 percent reported such fantasies less than once a year. Thirteen percent had them a few times a year, 11 percent once a month, 8 percent once a week, and 5 percent several times a week. (Twenty-one percent of the respondents said they'd been sexually assaulted in real life.)

Rape fantasies can be either erotic or aversive. In erotic fantasies, the woman thinks: "I'm being forced and I enjoy it." In aversive fantasies, she thinks: "I'm being forced and I hate it." Forty-five-percent of the women in the recent survey had fantasies that were entirely erotic. Nine percent were entirely aversive. And 46 percent were mixed.

Rape or near-rape fantasies are central to romance novels, one of the perennial best-selling categories in fiction. These books are often called "bodice-rippers" and have titles like Love's Sweet Savage Fury, which imply at least some degree of force. In them, a handsome cad becomes so overwhelmed by his attraction to the heroine that he loses all control and must have her, even if she refuses--which she does initially, but then eventually melts into submission, desire, and ultimately fulfillment.

Romance novels are often called "porn for women." Porn is all about sexual fantasies. In porn for men, the fantasy is sexual abundance--eager women who can't get enough and have no interest in a relationship. In porn for women as depicted in romance novels, the fantasy is to be desired so much that the man loses all control, though he never actually hurts the woman, and in the end, marries her.

What do rape fantasies mean? In my opinion, they are no different from any other fantasies. They are neither wrong nor perverted. They imply nothing about one's mental health or real-life sexual inclinations. They just happen, to somewhere around half of women. If you have such fantasies and feel bad about them, I can't tell you how to feel. But I can assure you that you are not alone. Rape or near-rape fantasies are surprisingly common. What do you think?

Starrphuk is the phirst to admit she has Rape Fantasies. I often imagine "him" coming outta the basement as I am walking up the stairs and coming up behind me and overpowering me in the stairwell of my building. I've told him about it and am waiting to see if it happens one day. What say you?

Have a great day the Starrphuk way!;)

La Reina

First Amendment Has been Suspended

2010-07-02T13:24:00.000-04:00

Dr. Dre feat. Jay-Z - Under Pressure (NMC Tags)

2010-06-21T23:21:00.000-04:00

What do you guys think?! I think I might have to hear it like two more times before I phully pheel it. :)

Dr. Dre feat. Jay-Z - Under Pressure (NMC Tags)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)

La Reina

Starrphuk's Song of the day...

2010-06-18T17:36:00.001-04:00

Starrphuk is pleased to present the song of the day..... Drake ft The Dream - "Shut it down". The beat is INSANE and his singing is NICE. His raps are great as well. I put this song on and start doing a dance phor the Boyfriend. It is a sensual song so you can easily do a strip tease phor your S/O. I like to sit him in a chair ifo the mirror and then slowly proceed to peel my clothes off while gyrating phor him. I like to drop down to my hands and knees and writhe my way to him. Do an amazing strip phor him while throwing your hair all around and poking your booty out, arching that back like an alley cat. ;-)

These girls ain't got nothing on you
uhh, say baby I had to mention
that if you were a star you'd be the one I'm searching for
other girls they got attention
but I just always feel like their in need of something you got
obvious you're pretty
heard that your a student working weekends in the city
trying to take you out girl, hope your not too busy
and if there's nothing wrong, got this little song
for you to get ready to
put those fucking heels on and work it girl
let that mirror show you what your doing
put that fucking dress on and work it kind of vicious
like somebodys taking pictures

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

Rinna La Reina

If you could become any fictional character, who would you be?

2010-06-16T13:48:00.003-04:00

Scarlet O'Hara. She took gruff from NO ONE. She was a bad bish before her time.

Ask me and I shall tell you.

Would you rather swim in a pool or the ocean?

2010-06-16T13:48:00.001-04:00

Ocean all day.

Ask me and I shall tell you.

What was the most interesting place you've traveled to?

2010-06-16T13:47:00.001-04:00

Nicaragua

Ask me and I shall tell you.

How many countries have you traveled to?

2010-06-16T13:46:00.001-04:00

Hmm, Mexico 50X, Dominican Republic 3X, Bahamas 1X, Costa Rica 3X, Nicaragua 1X, Puerto Rico 1X. Now it is time to go to Europe. :)

Ask me and I shall tell you.

If you could have an endless supply of any food, what would you get?

2010-06-16T13:40:00.001-04:00

Nom Nom, Ummmmm, lobster, crab, shrimp, fish. Anything from the Sea.

Ask me and I shall tell you.

would you prefer the path train or walking

2010-06-16T13:39:00.001-04:00

Depends on my mood & the weather. Sometimes I walk to Downtown instead of taking the PATH.

Ask me and I shall tell you.

Starrphuk's Song of the day...

2010-06-10T01:46:00.000-04:00

Is the lovely song by Amerie.... "Why don't we fall in love."

Now I know ya'll out there are like "Really Rinna?" "A love song?" Well this is how Starrphuk is pheeling right now, she is in love! So deal with it! LOL I love the beat, and the way she sings this song, she was phalling in love at the time. It's a great song anyway, with lyrics like:

It takes such a load off to let you know
That you're the only one I never want to go
Things I never did now I want to do
A love I never felt, now I feel with you

Why don't I just swallow each and every ounce of my pride
Everything you do I wanna feel again
Ain't no use for us to pretend

Why don't we, don't we (Why can't we)
Why don't we (Why can't we), why don't we (Why can't we)
Why don't we fall in love (We, we, why can't we fall)
Why don't we, why don't we (Yeah, yeah)
Why don't we fall in love (Oh)
Why (Yeah)

Well I hope you enjoy this little ditty as I am LOVING this song right now...
Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-06-10T00:52:00.000-04:00

Ohhhhhh, it is about that time... time phor Beach Ball Booty!!!

This one is phun because you are on the beach, waves lapping at you while you are pressed against each other. *Shivers*

This position gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "Havin' a ball." Lie on your tummy right at the shoreline. Put a beach ball under your pelvic area, keeping your legs spread slightly and your arms outstretched in phront of you. Have your man lie over you in the same position with his legs together between yours and enters you phrom behind.

Since your pelvis is elevated by the ball, he has unprecedented access to the G-Spot. The combination of his thrusts and the water lapping up against your phlesh pheels downright sinful!

EXXXTRA CREDIT:

Dig your toes into the sand to steady yourself. Being anchored gives you better leverage for more passionate pelvic pumping.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)

La Reina

How many ppl have you had sex with in one session

2010-06-04T02:35:00.001-04:00

Who are you and why should I tell you? Ask showing your info maybe I'll tell you.

Ask me and I shall tell you.

Starrphuk's Song of the day...

2010-06-04T00:53:00.001-04:00

Is the uber sensual song..............

"If you can't say no" by Lenny Kravitz. OMFG!!!! He is SOOOOOOOOOOOO insanely SEXY to me. All 5' of him. HA! There is pretty much nothing he can do wrong to me. I mean since the phirst time I laid eyes on him, I. Was. Smitten. He has been one rocker I can say I have had Sticky Fingers ;) over phor QUITE some time. *Shivers at the thought of him* whew...... Sorry ya'll! Was thinking of pleasuring myself to him....

ANYWAY... with lyrics like these ya can't go wrong with this song...

I know that you are in love with me
But I also know your kind
Well, baby you got a lot of nerve
So just try to keep me in mind, oh oh...
If you can't say no just think about
If you can't say no just think about
If you can't say no just think about me, me hey
If you can't say no just think about
If you can't say no just think about
If you can't say no just think about me

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Get Him To The Greek - A Review

2010-06-02T04:02:00.000-04:00

Last week Starrphuk was privileged to attend the NYC Screening of "Get Him To The Greek" Starring Jonah Hill, Russell Brand & Sean "Diddy" Combs.

Let me start off by saying there were some sexy people in attendance and there was a great vibe the whole night. I ran into people I hadn't seen in years and met some new phriends I can't wait to hang with more! The movie got underway and OMG it was one HELL of a movie! Phrom the opening phrame to the last still this movie DELIVERS! I say it is on the same level as "Hangover".

The same director phrom "Phorgetting Sarah Marshall" was involved so you KNOW this movie is rife with HILARITY! Russell Brand plays the same character phrom "FSM", Aldous Snow and needs to be brought phrom London in three days to perform at the Greek Theatre in Los Angeles. This was one ride that the audience was ready to give itself up to.

It was so phunny, that I snorted my Sprite/Fruit Punch mix outta my nose quite a phew times! LOL The whole audience guffawed, cringed, laughed, and snorted collectively. There was so MUCH laughter as a matter of phact, that I can't wait phor the movie to come out so I can watch it again seeing as I (and all of the audience) missed quite a phew of the one-liners that were phlying phast and phuriously throughout the whole movie. There are quotables phrom beginning to end! *Case in point* "I'm mind phuking you. Can you pheel it?" 'Yes, yes I can'. "I'm mind phuking the shit outta you." 'I hope you are wearing a condom, my mind is pretty dirty.' Ah man!!! Or how about, "Nigga you four zippers away phrom being Thriller!" THAT ONE KILLED ME!

GO SEE THIS MOVIE!!!! You shan't be disappointed!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex poll phor the day...

2010-06-02T03:14:00.000-04:00

How many of you believe the whole "Tramp Stamp" theory?

You know the old adage that if a chick has a tattoo on her lower back that is the "Tramp Stamp" Mark. That she easily puts out and has Daddy issues? Hmmmm I am inclined to believe it yet at the same time don't seeing as Starrphuk has a HUGE tattoo on her lower back. Spanning phrom hip to hip. What you say you?

Let's hear your opinons!!!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk's Song of the day...

2010-06-02T02:46:00.002-04:00

Is one I have been bumping EVERYDAY!!!! I phuking LOVE this song!! Wait for it... Wait for it...

Massive Attack by Nicki Minaj ft Sean Garrett

With verses like:
So so hot in here it feels like a jungle (yeah)
Me don't like boys that ain't jumbo (yeah)
One time bust a shot for my champion girls
Tell them guys super-size me a combo
Kno-kno-know I got the ammo
That's why I bullet-proofed the Lambo
In the middle east on a camel
Running through the jungle, Rambo
Liberace tango, swinging on a vine, mango (mango?)
So call me Simba little mama
Cause Mufasa couldn't stop her
Bitch I fly in on a chopper just to buy Balenciaga
It's just me, Mr. Miyagi and the phantom of the opera
Going "blocka" motherfucka, got the big rocket launcha

How can I NOT like this song. Besides, the beat is HAWT and the Video is AWESOME!!!!!!!! Amber Rose is too damn sexy in the video. It makes me wanna put on a Green Wig put some Barbie Pink Lipstick on and grind my hips in time to the music phor my man so he can watch my phine ass... Blocka blocka blocka :)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Le Trapeze and phood.

2010-06-01T23:44:00.000-04:00

According to the email I just received, Le Trapeze has lost their Restaurant/Phood licensing as they can no longer keep up with the demands of the New York City restaurant regulations.

What that means for you. Well you shall no longer have subpar hot/cold phood served to you. Old cookies, questionable deli meats and the like. On the plus plus side, they are renovating the bar area so you may continue to bring your own bottles of whatever you please. They will continue to provide juice & soda mixers, cups and ice. They will still have pizza night and all special parties will be catered.

I hope this info is helpful to those of you wishing to go out and rawk out all night long. Maybe get a bite to eat before and then make your way to bliss many many times over.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-06-01T18:00:00.000-04:00

It is that time again..... Time phor the Sex Position of the Day!!!!

Today Starrphuk brings you... Tawdry Tube!!!!!!

It all starts with an inner tube. Or a round floaty device. Get him to sit down on it with his legs dangling over. Then lower yourself on top (phace to phace) of him straddling his luscious man meat. ;-) Use your hands on his shoulders or the tube for some support. Once he is phully in you, start rocking back and forth. He can make you cum phaster by grabbing your hips and helping thrust you.

The phace to phace position is waaaaaay intimate. You are looking into each other's eyes and giving him a phull view of your spectacular body. Since the tube is hollow, all the water splashing you created by your thrusting hits both of your sexual domains, adding to the titillation.

EXXXTRA CREDIT:
To put yourself in a better G-spotting pose, change the angle of penetration by placing your legs over his shoulders and leaning back.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Hmm, I might have to do this with my man this weekend!!

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-06-01T13:44:00.001-04:00

Today's selection kids is the lovely lovely lovely song, "I think she likes me" by Jadakiss ft. Nicki Minaj off his new mixtape; "The Champ is Here Part 3".

I LOVE his final verse on the song:

Thuggin it, she lovin it
Talkin bout my ruggedness
Feelin her so much I let her call me by my government
Nice soft ass even softer when I'm rubbin' it
Gotta lotta cash but I'm tryna get some other grip
Stay straight Fly right good taste high price
Type that you buy ice possibly my wife
Hips mean thighs tight
Works out rides bikes
Cause all that excites me and I think she likes me
Cause all that excites me and I think she likes me

And Nicki's Lyrics Go HARD for her favorite rapper!

We was at da heat game peep game let him see da g-string
Yves St Laurent size fives a petite frame
He like comon Nicki really why you keep playin?
Said his name was Jada' I said ooh das a unique name,
I go and see him out in yonkers in da back block
He in da matchbox ballin like da mascots
He said im dead hott pull up in the brass drop
I see them hatin ass bitches in the backdrop
That's why I kiss him right in front of them
He ont want none of them
Even when its dark I be sonin them
Plus I keep the thing thing mighty tight
And if he think I like him then he might be right

I just adore Nicki Minaj and I am LOVING me some Jadakiss lately. His lyrics are on point and he kills any song he is on, be it his own or a guest spot. Nicki is Lil' Kim 2.0 but I just ADORE her!!! Her swag is right, (and she loves the ladies, SCORE!! lol) They both make this song GREAT by bringing their own thing to the table. I hope you enjoy Starrphuk's selection phor Song of the Day! I know I bump this song at LEAST five times a day. Just ask my roomie & my houseguest! LOL

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk of the Day

2010-06-01T13:27:00.000-04:00

Is none other than that sexy soulful son of a gun.... Justin Timberlake.

I mean come on ladies, is he not a hot piece of man meat?

*Drools*

He is easy on the eyes, has on HELL of a voice and is a true Southern Gentleman. I will say Starrphuk has not really heard anything negative about JT relationship wise. He is with the ladies he is with and that is pretty much it. He might phlirt, but really whom of us out there DOESN'T phlirt? He stays in a relationship until it runs the course it is supposed to. (Or gets cheated on... mmm hmmm I am looking at you Miss Spears!)

He is one heck of a guy with his charities that he works with as well as his own charity The Justin Timberlake foundation. He works with the Shriners, Childwatch & Habitat for Humanity he even puts together Golf tournaments. I give him a standing ovation when it comes to the total package. So that in a nutshell is why he is Starrphuk's pick phor Starrphuk of the Day! Enjoy ladies!!!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk had MIND BLOWING sex in the streets of NYC.

2010-05-26T03:38:00.000-04:00

HOW WAS YOUR NIGHT?! LOL

Ya'll know I take a day or two to get around to posting things so heeeeeeeeeeeeere we go! *In my Slick Rick voice*

Last Thursday I had a meeting with the new GM of Cheetah's Gentleman's Club in Midtown. They are looking phor new promoters so I went to meet the DJ so we could all discuss some business.

WELL I got a ride with my, "Man-Phriend", Phuk Buddy, Boyfriend, Sweetums, Lizard, (inside joke) Love; whatever he wants to be called, to Manhattan. While we were on the way to the Tunnel we had our usual laughs (He makes me laugh, not just a little twitter, a phull blown belly laugh.) and the usual Rap to me he has. Always something new but he ALWAYS has a rap phor me. Makes me pheel so damn special. :-D

ANYWAY, we were about to get to the tunnel when I gave him "the look". You all know the look, it is that look when nothing else matters but SEX. No matter where you are, what time of day, NOTHING. He was like, what? I said you know babe, I wanna suck ya dick. He said, head in the whip?!?! Of course papa, I answered with a HUGE smile on my phace. I then proceed to undo my seat belt and undo his pants so I can slide his sweet dick out.

DISCLAIMER!!!! Up until this point, I had never sucked his dick. So the phirst time he gets to pheel my juicy lips wrapped around his amazing cock, he was driving. Well I was so excited to PHINALLY get to slide his gorgeous rod into my mouth I was DRIPPING wet! I bent over and just started slowly bobbing my head up and down his magnificent tool. He was murmuring his approval while my tongue darted all over his head and my hands did their work as well. I took him ALL THE WAY into my throat and I phelt the car jerk! I was like whoa babe, keep an eye on the road, don't even think about me. ;-) (yeah like THAT will happen!!)

All of a sudden he said ma, we are at the Tunnel. I said, so, who cares? Then thought about it and didn't pheel like having a pic of my ass up in the air circulating around the Port Authority Police. LOL Once we cleared the lanes and were in the tunnel I went right back to what I was doing. All I hear him say is damn Rinna, I never had my dick sucked like this before! Why did you wait so long before doing it?! And at that I REALLY put it on him by going all out, tongue darting back and forth, mouth firmly clamped hands working and sucking him all the while making it UBER sloppy. Now while I am doing this his hand is on my ass, making its way to my pussy. Once there he says Wow baby, your pussy is dripping! I gave a jiggle of my ass and he slid his phingers inside of me. He went in and out of me like he was phuking me. I phound myself starting to moan and writhe while he says, ah, you like that huh baby? When those words come outta his mouth, I came so HARD he was like I pheel you cumming Rinna, I pheel it, come all over my phingers.

At this point we were outta the tunnel and at the light. I stopped what I was doing and look over to the car next to us and they were like WHOO HOO! I started laughing and told him to pull over. He said where? I tell him to turn onto Washington and pull over just before Debrosses St. He said what are you going to do? I tell him you want it right? So get over here. He gets outta the car, comes around to my side, opens the door and I get on all phours. He slowly pulls my dress up over my INSANELY huge ass and I pull my panties to the side and tell him to give it to me, please, please, please. (Yes Ms. Starrphuk begged phor the dick! And what?!)

He slowly slid his cock in me and I already phelt the sensations building as he pumped in and out. All the while with me crying out about how good it is. In less than 6 pumps I came! Telling him Ay viene papa! I'm coming! OMG Now of course Starrphuk has to be on the lookout for the cops because it is Lewd & Lascivious conduct and I am not trying to get arrested for some BS. Well I see everyone who is out and about looking over at us and staring at us. I don't mind, I could care less. It isn't like I shall be seeing any of these people ever again, ya know? :-) I notice one chick in particular standing on the corner just watching us the whole time with a HUGE smile on her phace. He was sliding in and out of me so damn good I came again and then he pulled out and I quickly turned around and took him into my mouth so I could as Jadakiss says; "sacame leche" LOL He just stood there whimpering like a little puppy. I LOVE that, being able to make a grown man almost go to his knees off of some AMAZING sex.

We stood by the car and talked phor a phew minutes making each other laugh and just bs'ing. Then he asked me if I want more. I said baby, how many times do I have to tell you, I ALWAYS want it. I can never get enough. So if you are game I am down!!! And with that I turned around and pulled my panty outta the way for him and wiggled my ass saying you want it papa? Porque si lo quieres lo puedes tener.(Because if you want it you can have it) Es todo tuyo (It is all yours) He said oh shit, here you go again, speaking to me in Spanish. You KNOW I can't resist that Rinna. So put it in me already pa and lets stop playing I tell him!!! We were going at it for a good 10 minutes when I hear a commotion to the left. I look and a dude is coming outta the building not 10' from us! My Boo was like Rinna there is a guy right there! I know I say but oh well, keep going! He walks past us and goes to meet the girl who has been on the corner this WHOLE time watching us. It was HIGH-LARRY-US as all you see is my HUGE tanned ass in the air, legs all askew and him trying to hide me as much as possible. I wish I had gotten some film of that!

We obviously continued what we were doing as the was NO WAY we were stopping. The thrill of getting caught, people watching us, and being on the lookout for the cops was MORE than enough to push me over the edge MULTIPLE times. I thoroughly enjoyed my ride that night. hehehehe He was such an attentive lover, even though we were not in any position to be attended to, he certainly made sure I was good before he came. He would soft stoke it, teasing me then pound it then stop. Ah man, just had me all over the place!!

Whew! I am getting the shivers just writing about this now.... Damn. Starrphuk can't wait for Wednesday night. She gets to spend the night at her man's house..... YUM!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-05-25T00:23:00.000-04:00

Try this tantalizing twist on the typical missionary position (him on top, you on bottom). Instead of having your man rest on his elbows, ask him to slide two to four inches forward. Have him place his arms on either side of your shoulders, letting his body fall flat against yours. Make sure you both keep your spines straight. With your legs touching his, push your pelvis up about two inches. Your man should push down gently, providing a little counter-resistance. Instead of the usual in-and-out of thrusting, rock up and down.

Okay, so missionary doesn’t always make you quake. But because he’s in a more forward position, the base of his penis should naturally rub your clitoris. The rocking motion draws out the orgasm, building pleasure gradually. Because both sets of genitals are sharing such tight quarters, your climb to the climax will be intensified.

EXXXTRA CREDIT:

To add extra oomph to this passion pose, give his cheeks a firm squeeze, then trail your fingers slowly up his back. When you reach his head gently run your fingers over his scalp then pull him in for a kiss he’ll never forget.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-05-24T23:58:00.002-04:00

Is that sexy phuking song: Woman by Maroon 5.

So phuking nice. The beat, the words, the voice, melody. I mean EVERYTHING about this song drives me WILD!!!! Every time I hear it I just wanna jump his bones. Don't let him be standing next to me when it DOES come on. lol I get so excited I jump right on top of him and ride him to completion. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Helplessly melting as I stand next to the sun
As she burns me, I am screaming loud for more
I drink every drop of liquid heat that I've become
Pop me open spill me out onto the floor

I mean did you HEAR that beat?!?!?!?!?!?! Do you hear the words he is saying?! OMFG! Just put this song on, and do a sexy dance phor your partner... You shall be VERY pleased with the results!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk has udd stories to tell y'all! NSFW!!!!!

2010-04-28T02:26:00.000-04:00

Stories that go phrom the night before I left phor Costa Rica up until last night...

Where do I begin?! Well let me go back about a month before I left on that vacation.

I was catering a ladies night in with some phriends. More of a teach and eat class amongst phormer co workers & phriends. I was on Wall St. in a FABU apartment with two girlfriends showing them how to throw together things phound in the pantry. She had some asparagus, risotto, halibut, capers, grape tomatoes, onions, chili powder, lemons, extra virgin olive oil & S&P.

Quick cooking lesson guys!! Bare with me! :)

I made Halibut Provençal style. I took some phoil, drizzled the foil with EVOO, put the phish on it, drizzled with more EVOO then S&P, cut the grape tomatoes in half, threw a phew slices of onions on it, a phew capers, a LITTLE chili powder and pholded up the phoil and did the same to the rest of the phish. I then put the asparagus to steam using a double boiler method. Take one pot and put water in it. then take a colander and put the veggies in it and put the water to boil. The steam will come up and perfectly steam your veggies as opposed to you just throwing them in the water. GROSS! DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT THROW YOUR VEGETABLES INTO THE WATER. IT NOT ONLY TAKES ALL THE NUTRITIONAL VALUE OUT OF THEM, IT MAKES THEM MUSHY AND DISGUSTING. THAT IS THE REASON MOST OF US HATED EATING VEGGIES AS KIDS. Sorry I was off on a tangent. lol I put the risotto on and all came together in a bout 10 minutes. We had some ladies come by whom were going out and asked us if we were interested in going to this lesbian bar.

Everyone LOVED the phood and was pleasantly surprised it was all so easy. So we all got ready and braved the cold night air to go shimmy and shake at The Gates. We get there and of course La Reina is the ONLY woman in the world to go to a lesbian bar and get hit on by a man in drag. I was dancing by the bar and was hitting on some chicks. Well this person comes up behind me and starts grinding on me. I was like phuk it, lets dance! It wasn't until I phelt his stubble on my neck as he was trying to kiss my neck. I was like WTF is going on here?! I am in a lesbian bar and of course only ME would get picked up by a guy. LMFAO

I was like phuk it I'll keep dancing, I mean it is only a dance right? Well I guess to him it was WAY more than that. I was drinking and he turns me around and in his best Wendy Williams voice was like "Hi baby, you are so phuking sexy, I love your body." "Can I phuk you?"

I was like hold the phuk up! He kept pheeling my boobs and running his hands all over my body and I was like whoa man! "He was like baby, I love you body!" I was like get in line. LOL When I say this dude was dressed, he had his wig, push up bra (with toilet paper), cute top, skinny jeans and booties. I was like WOW, wheretheydothatat?! HA! I was thrown phor a loop phor sure. Ya'll know Starrphuk is one cool chica but for some reason this had me DUMBFOUNDED. Anyway, I gather my shit and make phor the phireplace and whom is behind me? Ru-Paul in all his glory. Talking about "Baby, your ass is so phuking phine, your tits are INSANE, your phace is giving me all sorts of Hollywood, I wanna eat your cooze, can I?"

Well I did the only logical thing I could do. Grab two lesbians and start making out with them. HARD! I let them sandwich me and made out with them phor a good ten minutes hoping he would get the picture. NO! He stood around trying to get in where he phit in. Which was no where. Ugh. I grabbed my girls and we hightailed it outta there.

We started to go to the Hudson hotel but some of us wanted to make it back to the apartment and "chill". ;-) So one of the girls and myself grab a cab and make our way back to Wall Street. As we are on the FDR Jessica* says come here Rinna and grabs me and shoves her tongue down my throat, talking about "Give me those phuking gorgeous lips". All the while pulling out my tits and sucking on my nipples. I said phuk it, lets do this shit. The cabbie was looking at us in the rearview so I decided to give him a show. I slowly started nibbling on her neck and then made my way down to her snatch. I phelt the cab swerve and I told him, watch it man, we wanna get home safe so we can phuk. He almost lost control AGAIN! LOL

When we get upstairs she was like Riiiiiiiiiina!!!!!!!! Drags me into the room and tells me to "Eat the phuk outta my snatch!" She tears my clothes off and proceeds to suck on my nipples so hard I had to tell her to slow down, it was hurting! She had a nice smelling vag, which btw is very phuking important ladies. The only problem I had with it was she had some hair on her vagine. I CAN'T STAND HAIR ON A SNATCH. Just a word to you ladies out there hoping to pheel the lips and tongue of La Reina darting in between your lips. You better make sure you have a nice clean shaved pussy.

I sucked on her nice titties and slowly moved my hands over her body down to her pearl, which was already engorged and ready phor me to plunder. I flicked the clit and loved watching her phace as she moaned in ecstasy. So I decided to put my phace to her lips and suck. My tongue darted in and out of her pussy and she writhed on the bed like a woman possessed. All of a sudden she grabs me and throws me under her and starts eating my pussy as if it was her last meal and she wanted to gobble up everything I had to offer. She had great phorm but since she was SOOOOOOOOO drunk her execution was off. LOL

I ended up phlipping her over and taking control of the situation. I was phinger phuking her all the while lapping her juices up and she kept saying "Phuk me Mami, Phuk me Mami!" So I got into position and kept my phingers in her as I was on top of her. I could pheel her walls tightening up on me and knew she was close. "Cum phor me Jessica, Cum phor me." I kept telling her. All of a sudden I phelt her pussy tighten up on my phingers and she clawed at my back like a wild woman. The phloodgates opened and before I knew it the bed was soaked. I was like "Hell yeah!" I even did a Tiger Woods fist pump. HA!

We phell asleep in each others arms and when we awoke it was snowing so heavily I almost didn't make it back to New Jersey. I certainly hope that this phirst of a series of stories has tided you over phor now. ;-)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-03-15T21:39:00.000-04:00

YUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!! It is the Get Down On It.

Sounds delish!!! I think me needs to do this straight away!!! Especially since I want to start doing some Yoga again. Hmmmmm.

Help your partner get comfortable in the traditional lotus position, with his legs crossed and each of his heels atop the opposite knee. Facing him, sit in his lap and mount him, with your legs wrapped snugly around his waist. Embrace each other and lock lips with a shared breath, so that as you exhale your guy inhales and vice versa. As you breathe in, rock your pelvis back and tighten your vaginal muscles. As you exhale, rock your pelvis forward and release. Your guy should mirror your movements.

Yoga fanatics, this one couldn’t be more perfect for you. Syncing up your breathing, looking into each other's eyes and moving together while in this position will deepen your intimacy as you both ride the wave to a mind-blowing climax.

EXXXTRA CREDIT:

Take your time getting into this couldn’t-be-closer position. Relaxation is key. First, set the perfect mood with scented candles and soothing music. Then loosen each other up with sexy full-body massages. Enhance your rub with some aromatic oils, ensuring that both of you are slicked down.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-15T21:08:00.001-04:00

Is the classic banger by none other than Tupac Shakur.

"All about you".
I see you struttin' in ya mini-skirt
A crooked smile, wit a heart that did plenty dirt
Will it work, witcha ass as you pass me by
Sayin' Hey, I been lookin' at your smile all day
Lets parlay. Drinkin' liquor
Kissin' to help you know me quicker
While I keep workin on ya zipper
My tongue kissin, any position
I'm fortified to do the mission
Move ya hips and groove to this
To many cooks is in the kitchen
Nobody takes the time to listen
They probably think we still dissin'
Wit your permission I can make ya scream my name
I'm a real man, got ya through this sleezy game
Follow me, Let me take you to extacy.
You'll have the time of your life when your next to me
You'll see, aint no way that they can stop me
When I know a true thug woman got me.
It's all about U.
Ah man Tupac ripped it in all of his songs but this one was on POINT!

I mean come on how can you not love this phuking song? He is one smooth motherphuker. He was a true legend in his own time and is sorely missed by Starrphuk. He was also so damn fine a chica can still phanasize about him.... *Shivers*

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-03-14T20:31:00.001-04:00

YUMMMMMMMMM It is Lap Limbo time ya'll!!!! Get it in bitches!

Your guy sits back in a roomy chair with a pillow placed under his knees to elevate them. Now you straddle him, lower yourself into the triangle of his lap, and lean back so you're resting against his raised thighs. Bend your knees and put your ankles over his shoulders so they rest on the back of the chair. He grasps your hips as he enters you, and you set the rocking in motion by pushing your feet against the top of the chair as he thrusts by pulling your hips toward him.

The payoff of this racy recliner move starts with pure visual pleasure. With you in his lap, legs open, he's got an up-close-and-intimate view of you, plus easy access to touch your breasts, your tummy, and between your legs. All that tender stroking will intensify the sensual, superslow buildup brought on by his minimal movements.

EXXXTRA CREDIT:

Since you're in full control of the angle and depth of your stud's penetration in this position, you can aim his penis toward your navel to hit the G-spot. Be his tawdry tour guide and tilt your bod just the right way so he shares the feel-good sensations.

OMFG! Starrphuk LOVES this one. Even with her tummy being a lil extra she still has phun doing this one. She just lets go and lets it cum.... hehehe It is a phun one cause you just throw the head back, titties are bouncing left and right and things are just super duper... HA! He can grab your ass and make you go phaster, slower, harder... You control it but he can help the control.... Whew. Mama needs some dick! Who is stepping up to the plate? ;-)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-14T14:31:00.001-04:00

Is none other than that PHANTASTICALLY orgasmic song, I'm a Slave for U by the bad bish:

Britney Spears.

With lyrics like:

I'm a slave for you
I cannot hold it, I cannot control it
I'm a slave for you
I won't deny it, I'm not tryin' to hide it

Baby, don't you wanna dance up on me
To another time and place
Oh baby, don't you wanna dance up on me
Leaving behind my name and age

Ahhhhhh yes... Honestly phor Starrphuk, the beat is so phuking sickkkkkkkkk. All you have to do is literally sit your S/O down and dance phor him/her. Use the wall so you have leverage and just bump and grind to this song. All the while slowly taking your clothes off and touching yourself looking them right in the eye. That shit is amazingly hot! Shiiiiiiit, Starrphuk wishes she had a chica dacning phor her right now showing me the business. I'd be all over her like white on rice. Of course I'd much rather dance phor the boytoy.... >;-) You know show him what it is all about. Hmmm, me thinks I shall have to set something up phor when I come home. Gyrate phor him and let him know how much I want him. ;-) BRANNNNNNDON! (That's the alias, haha I can't let ya'll know who he is!)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk is in Costa Rica Kiddos!

2010-03-14T09:40:00.000-04:00

And will be here until the 27th of March. I will TRY to update a few times while I am here but I HATE having to pay for the internet while outta the country. Kiss kiss to everyone and all our phollowers on PhaceBook and here. Be well and REMEMBER!!!! DON"T BE A PHOOL; WRAP YOUR TOOL!!!!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

RIP BIGGIE SMALLS AKA THE NOTORIOUS B.I.G. AKA BIGGIE AKA CHRISTOPHER WALLACE

2010-03-09T02:20:00.000-05:00

RIP TO THE BIGGIE SMALLS. WE MISS YOU MORE AND MORE EVERYDAY. YOUR CROWN WAS SNATCHED FROM YOU FAR TO YOUNG. WE CAN ONLY HOPE YOU ARE RESTING PEACEFULLY. IT HAS BEEN 13 YEARS SINCE YOUR PASSING AND WE HAVE NOT FOUND ANYONE TO FILL YOUR HUGE SHOES.
Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Freaknik - The Musical

2010-03-08T18:41:00.001-05:00

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME ONE OF YA'LL SAW THIS LAST NIGHT?!?!?!?!?!?! OH EM PHUKING GEE! THAT SHYTE WAS PHUKING HIGH-LARRY-US!!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

A Huge Flying Condom?!

2010-03-08T05:13:00.000-05:00

According to About.com

I've written extensively about Jonah Falcon, the man with theworld's largest penis, and even featured him in this video report on AOL News, entitled, "No Work for Man With Giant Sex Organ."

When I made the now-viral video on Jonah, he was looking for a job and feeling the holiday blues.

Now, things are looking up for my friend. You'll be hearing a lot more of Jonah in the weeks to come. Jonah tells me The Daily Show has been talking to him -- and we could only expect this is going to be something good!

More good news: The French just unfurled the world's biggest condom!

The 120-foot-long inflatable rubber -- which might be too big for Jonah and most Jurassic-era reptiles -- actually flies.

It was built by a safe-sex group called "CondomFly," and will take to the skies on a five-continent, 100-city world tour on Dec. 1 to promote World AIDS Day.

The French hope this dirigible prophylactic will come to be known as "The Goodyear Blimp of Safe Sex." It can carry three people plus a pilot. And when it hits the United States, I've already asked to go for a ride. I'm hoping Jonah will join in to help promote the cause. And, possibly, try it on.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-03-08T03:44:00.001-05:00

Are you ready to have phun doing the "Backstairs Boogaloo"???? I am!! Or rather, I have!

Kneel in phront of your partner at the landing of a staircase. Both of you should be phacing the stairs, and your bodies should mesh together tightly. While you reach up and hold on to each side of the banister for support (or to the stairs themselves), he should hold your hips while he penetrates you phrom behind.

This mind-blowing pose lets your man use the incline of the staircase to enter you at a unique upward tilt, allowing him unlimited access to your G-spot. For more intense pressure, you can bear down on him so your butt meshes super snuggly with his groin — talk about a stairway to heaven!

EXXXTRA CREDIT:
Double your (and his) pleasure during this pose. If you hold on to the stairs with one hand and trigger your passion button with the other, the sensation is spine-tingling. When you can't take it anymore, reach through your legs to grope his testicles, sending the extra bliss his way.

Starrphuk hopes you have phun trying this one out! She has done this one before so make sure you have pillows phor your knees as they do start to hurt!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-08T03:15:00.001-05:00

Is by the sexily voiced and sexy herself, I might add, Bebel Gilberto. This Brazilian bombshell has been singing since her phather, Joao Gilberto took her into the recording booth when she was phive and she sang a song phor his album with Stan Getz. I decided to pick this one as the phirst in quite a phew that will be coming phrom Ms. Gilberto since it is in English and I wanted to introduce you to her phirst in English then Portuguese.

So please enjoy "So Nice" (Summer Samba)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk of the Day

2010-03-08T02:26:00.005-05:00

Is none other than that Sexy Sumbitch.........

Vin Daggum Diesel! I mean WOW. I can't help it. Starrphuk phinds him to be a guilty pleasure of hers! LOOK AT THOSE DEVIL'S HORNS!!!!!! YES YES YES!

He is sexy as hell and once again has all of the pheatures that I phind to be so damn ridiculously sexily gorgeously insanely intriguingly titillatingly pleasingly intensely HOT!

You know, the bald/shaved head, the full lips, the expressive limpid pools that are his eyes, his eyebrows, some scruff, muscles and he isn't even THAT much of a muscle guy. Yes he has but he isn't 'roided out. I could go on and on. Oh wait, I did. HA!

I can't help that I phind him to be so damn alluring. His voice, his motherphuking stem, zë, صوت, галасы, глас, veu, 声音, glas, hlas, stemme, stem, hääl, boses, äänensä, voix, voz, Stimme, φωνή, קול, आवाज़, hangját, rödd, suara, guth, voce, 音声, 음성, balss, balsas, глас, suara, vuċi, voice, صدا, głos, voz, vocale, голоса, глас, hlas, glas, voz, sauti, voice, เสียง, ses, голоси, giọng nói, llais, שטימע is just so dayum sexy. It has made Starrphuk cum a few times!!!

I remember back in 2001 I was with a rebound and we were getting our dirty nasty sex on at the Courtesy Motel over the G.W.B. He was eating me out and a behind the scenes for The Fast and the Furious came on HBO. Once I heard him talking, I remember saying oh shit, and the most intense waves came over me like never before. I think I came about three times while he was talking about the movie. Joe even got mad because he said that he KNEW that was the reason I came so much. Oh well. If he had been eating me right maybe HE would have made me cum ;-)

For those of you who think he is too muscle-ly, ugly, or whatever, BOOO to you! LOL

What man you know that looks good in a suit, a thermal, a wife-beater, a button down, w/o a shirt, a regular tee, a skullie, WHEW!!!

So without further adieu I give you: VIN DIESEL!!

He phuking loves motorcycles, as do I. *DROOL*

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day...

2010-03-07T01:15:00.000-05:00

Have you tried the Wanton Wheelbarrow????? Sounds delish!!!!

Start by standing and phacing a bed or a chair. Bend over until your head and arms are resting on its surface. Have your man stand behind you and grab one of your ankles. Make sure to keep your knee slightly bent as you shift your weight to the leg that's still on the ground. Lifting your phoot to rest near his hip, he should enter you from behind.

The Wanton Wheelbarrow is a rockin' alternative for those addicted to the angles and impact of any phrom behind ride. Because your legs are pointed in opposite directions — one in the air and one on the ground — he's in perfect position to hit that oh-my-God G-spot. Plus, your man will be seriously turned on by the access to your posterior — have him give you some nice open handed smacks on your ass.

EXXXTRA CREDIT:

Get the Wanton Wheelbarrow on a roll by coordinating your thrusts. As he propels his hips forward, answer back with your booty by straightening your supporting leg. The two of you will meet in the middle for one hell of a ride that might just last all night!

Starrphuk thinks she will have a boytoy do this one with her when she sees him next. It is a maneuver that is most sexy, I can already pheel the chills on my back... mmmm

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-06T23:59:00.001-05:00

Is the great strip club song How Low (Remix) by Ludacris ft Ciara & Pitbull. This has such a great beat, the Avin and The Chipmunks voices and when you throw in Luda's phlow, Ci-Ci's lyrics and Pit's sexy English/Spanish phlow you get one amazing combo.

Luda:
New York, California, Philly and they really put it on ya when I'm down in Texas, Album numero ciete
Get ready phor the Battle of the Sexes/I'm restless, tryna tell 'em that I'm hotter than a burn of the 3rd degree/Then I try to tell 'em there ain't no one in the world as hot as me!

If you really going low, you gotta go hard,
Go lower than the grades on your report card,
Ludacris is the best that ever did it, did it,
When it comes to the money I'm like don't stop get it, get it,

Ciara:
See me in the air, I drop it down low/I back this thing up and make more money more/I hear you up in my ear like go shawty go/No I ain't a stripper but I do it like a pro/You said this girl can't make it bounce like this/Well shawty I'm the shit, shawty I'm the shit/Lady in the street, you know the rest/Put your money on the plhoor, how high can you go?

Honestly though, phor me the best verse on the song is Pitbull's!

With his lyrics like:
Ayeaye aye, mira como se ve la munecita con su trongita yo quiere bailar con el carne adentro
(She looks like a doll, and he wants to dance with his meat inside.)
I slip slide, dip dab whip pride Pitbull spit phire that's right (that's right) Now gimmie some bankhead baby and then later on I can Woody uh huh Woody wood ha ha ha ha ha ha pecker baby

You put this on phor your man/woman and twerk it out with your booty clap and drop it low. Set your mate on the bed or the sofa and give them a most stimulating dance by sitting phacing away phrom him. grind on him and lift your ass all the while by making your ass jump up and down and jiggle all over. Just make your ass muscles jump up and down then shake it phrom side to side. Phall back on him and gyrate your whole body slowly then bend over and just shake what ya mama gave ya. Believe me he will be thanking you all night long!

I hope you enjoy Starrphuk's song of the day. Don't be upset if you see this more than once. I would have posted it earlier but I was just now able to phind the Pitbull version.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day

2010-03-03T23:57:00.001-05:00

Oh hell's yeah, it's time to Straddle His Saddle!! YUM!!!!

Have your guy sit on the floor with his arms stretched out behind him for support and his legs crossed loosely Indian-style. Climb onto his lap so you're straddling him in a kneeling position and hold on to his shoulders as you lower yourself onto his erect penis. Lean toward him and keep your bodies close together as you take control of the timing and speed of the thrusting.... Ride him, cowgirl!

This is the ultimate girl-power position, because you command the action by alternating slow, shallow strokes with deep thrusts. To mix things up more, lower yourself down your man's shaft in drive-him-nuts circular motions (like a corkscrew), and this seriously simple sack-session becomes one wild ride. You'll be facing him, so the hot and heavy eye contact will make the action extra steamy.

EXXXTRA CREDIT:
With you in charge of the speed and depth, you can tease the supersensitive head of his penis and tantalize the lower third of your vagina, which is packed with excitable nerve endings. Then, just when he's about to explode in ecstasy, take his entire penis inside you for a sensational surprise.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-03T23:51:00.001-05:00

And the winner is.................................

Lil' Kim - No Matter What They Say

If I was you I'd hate me too
Louis Vuitton shoes and a whole lot of booze/Every other week a different a dude and other crews
I make offers nobody can refuse/You might even see me on the channel nine news
I get paid just for laying in the shade/To take pictures with a glass of lemonade
My rocks shine like it was dipped in Cascade/Wake up in the morning to breakfast from a maidWanted me so bad you went and copped the bootleg.
Y'all niggas played like a high top fade/Some of the shit I hear I don't know how it got played
Y'all rock Versace and y'all went out and bought it/I rock Versace and y'all know I ain't paid for it
My fam deep with security in the jeep/When the Queen come in town everything shut down

Such a good song, she looked phenomenal in it and had numerous Celebrity cameos she showed she was at the top of her game!! You can put this song on and sit your partner down and show him exactly how to dance to this song. It has a nice beat and when the song breaks in the middle you can REALLY give him a thrill!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

I want my Pun Pun Vajazzled!

2010-03-02T05:22:00.003-05:00

According to Gawker:

Everyone's getting vajazzled! Well, okay, maybe just Jennifer Love Hewitt and some chick who got it done for free and blogged about it. (Slightly NSFW. Also, ew.) But what do dudes think about this latest trend in private part adornment?

Vajazzling involves getting a Brazilian bikini wax and then putting individual Swarovski crystals on the outside (I think—I mean, Ihope—just the outside) of the vaginal region using adhesive. The spa where the blogger had it done, Completely Bare, apparently guarantees that they'll stay on for five days, but I would like to know what happens towards the end of the guaranteed period, to wit, this is not something I would like to get caught all up in there. And also, depending on how hairy you are, stuff could start growing back after five days and then you've got a big itchy crystal mess.

Anyway, the result is what the blogger called "a disco ball in my crotch." For $50.

So I put the question "Vajazzling: yes or no?" to several male acquaintances of mine. Was this something they'd want their girlfriends or random hookups to get done? Answer: no. In fact, they were almost uniformly horrified.

One friend—we'll call him Dan—took a look at the blogger's vajazzle and said, "While the photo of the end product was not nearly as absurd as i was expecting, absolutely NAY."

Or take this IM exchange I had with a guy friend, whom I will call "Brad":

me: what are your thoughts on vajazzling?
brad: A mixture of horror and curiosity.
me: would you be disturbed if someone you were having sex with went out and did it?
me: or... would you be into it
brad: It seems so... complicated.
brad: How does it effect me?
me: well, what if the crystals came off?
brad: Stop now.
brad: Thank you.
brad: I am against.

One lad, whom we'll call Scott, said he was opposed but could nonetheless see the appeal—for a certain type of man: "Er, I dunno. It's pretty weird. But I guess for people into kinky shit it's cool—Batman masks and whatnot." Or perhaps, I suggested, a vajazzle in the shape of a Batman mask? "Why not!" he said.

Said another friend—let's call him Phil: "Okay. Um, no. Wouldn't, it, um, hurt both parties while doing certain things? Okay, maybe it would be funny as a surprise one time. But all the time? It feels like a real hood rat ghetto sort of thing. Or a J Lo thing, which is maybe the same thing. Then again I am pretty anti tattoos and piercings and body mods in general. I think girls are just perfect the way they are."

(Aw.)

And Videogum editor Gabe Delahaye feels very strongly about this issue. "Gross. People who vajazzle should have their vaginas taken away," he said. "They can have them back when they are ready."

[Thanks to commenter AcerbaFemina for the tip.]
[Photo via Getty]

Send an email to Doree Shafrir, the author of this post, at doree@gawker.com.

I want my pussy vajazzled. Yes I said it, I want it Vajazzled. And what?! Phirst I'll go and get my Vajacial then make my way over to get it Vajazzled! Ahhhh Cleo would be a happy cat!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Secrets and Lives

2010-03-02T05:04:00.002-05:00

I came across this phascinating article earlier and just HAD to share it with all my Starrphuk's. I thought it was a most interesting article. Please read and tell me what you think.

According to The Age:

We've heard about the secret sexual lives of celebrities like Tiger Woods and Bill Clinton, but what about the man sitting next to you at work or the mate you play golf with every month?

WITH the sun on his face, he's the upstanding citizen, the devout churchgoer who runs a local business, perhaps the married father of three planting trees at a kindergarten working bee. But in the stolen hours of the night, he's making love to his secret boyfriend or gang-banging a stranger at a party that he hopes his wife will never find out about.

He is living a double life. Like Tiger Woods, without the golf trophies and private jet. Like Bill Clinton, without the Oval Office and expensive cigars. Like Herman Rockefeller - until his secret life was laid bare after his dismembered body was found in a junk-strewn backyard in Melbourne's northern suburbs four weeks ago.

Maybe he's a she, although psychologists suggest most people living double lives are men. Most are driven by a powerful sexual compulsion that cannot be satisfied in their conventional lives, so they embark on often extraordinarily complex secret lives.

And often, like Woods and Clinton, the potential for disaster upon being exposed is enormous. Relatives and friends are left devastated and shell-shocked. Families are torn apart. Careers are destroyed.

Melbourne-based private psychologist Marcus Squirrell, who specialises in the treatment of sexually compulsive behaviour, both online and offline, says the number of people living sexual double lives is growing.

A third of his patients are leading what can be described as a true double life - an entirely separate existence unknown to anyone in their ''real'' life. Their partner, friends and work colleagues have no idea of their compulsive sexual behaviour, affairs, bisexuality, or less conventional sexual interests such as attending orgies and swingers' parties, indulging in fetishes or spending hours each day engaged in erotic ''cybersex'' chats with strangers.

Advances in technology have made it easier for people to deceive their partners.

''I am firmly of the opinion that both the internet and mobile phones significantly contribute to one's capacity to develop sexually compulsive behaviour that otherwise would not have existed if it was not for easy access to an endless array of sexual material and other individuals who are also interested in meeting offline for sex,'' Squirrell says.

''I also see a number of bisexual men who act out sexually with other men and lead a double life where they hide these aspects of their sexuality from their girlfriends or wives.''

Squirrell has no doubt a small number of Victorian women lead double lives but says ''even though women go to the doctors for all sorts of ailments, many probably feel too ashamed to seek therapy for acting out sexually, so we don't see as many''.

It usually takes an unexpected collision of a double-lifer's two worlds for them to fully divulge the extent of their deception. ''It is typically only when they get caught that they disclose any of their history,'' Squirrell says.

Woods is a case in point. Although he must have known, at least on some level, how damaging exposure of his stripper-strewn secret life would be to his marriage, career and carefully constructed reputation as a wholesome family man, he only stopped when he was caught.

Like many double-lifers, Woods has been diagnosed as a sex addict. He has completed a 45-day inpatient treatment program to help him gain control over his compulsions, but it is also likely he is suffering from narcissistic personality disorder.

People who are able to maintain double lives for a long period often have this personality disorder, according to Action Psychology director Sarah Calleja, a relationship and sexual issues specialist.

''The trouble with narcissistic personalities is that they don't have any genuine empathy or remorse for what they do - they just leave disaster behind them," Calleja says.

Squirrell suggests many double-lifers maintain their deception because they enjoy the excitement of living on a knife edge. ''The danger could make a person feel alive again and assist someone who may be struggling with a midlife crisis and their fading looks,'' he says.

But by the time they walk through his door, he says, most feel ashamed of themselves - either because their secret has been discovered or because their deception has hurt the people they love the most.

''Many of the men that I see are suffering from depression and feel powerless in regards to ceasing their behaviour because their attempts in the past have failed,'' Squirrell says.

Melbourne Addiction Recovery Service counsellor and experiential therapist Melvyn Bowler says the clients he sees fall into two categories: ''Those who want to stop because it is destroying their lives, and those coerced into seeing me because someone is forcing them to.''

The term ''double life'', he says, is not used in recovery circles. ''We would say the person is in 'denial', and has constructed a whole range of psychological and other defences to protect themselves from the painful consequences of what they are doing,'' he says.

''If someone is seeing me because they have been forced to, then I attempt to break through their denial. I do not always succeed. Living a double life becomes simply a part of life - second nature if you like. And some people can handle stress better than others.''

But what happens to families when the roof over their comfortable, often conventional, heads caves in and the truth comes out? ''Families do fall apart,'' Squirrell says.

''I am seeing increasingly more women wanting insight into their partner's behaviour. They typically feel devastated by their partner's betrayal and are often trying to make sense of the confusion … the children are angry with their fathers.''

This devastation is as strongly felt by partners who find their lovers are addicted to watching online porn or spending hours having cybersex with strangers, he says. ''You don't have to be engaging in physical sex at swingers' parties or orgies to be unfaithful in a relationship.''

However, to assume that most people involved in couple swapping and group sex are leading double lives would be quite wrong, according to well-known swingers' party organiser ''Paul''.

Melbourne's ''official'' swinging community exists around a collection of regular events, held in private homes or clubs on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis. In any week in Melbourne, as many as 25 swingers' parties are on offer, each attracting between 50 and 100 guests. Most events involve couples, so there is not a high rate of ''double-lifers''.

But with websites such as redhotpie.com listing its membership at 1,790,584, it is likely that several thousand of those members are indulging in secret sex lives.

It is almost certain that some of the 1776 members of adultmatchmaker.com who were online talking sex at two o'clock on Friday afternoon were doing so without the knowledge of their partner.

''Lilah'', a mother of two adult children who works as a personal assistant in a small CBD office, concedes that some of her colleagues, if they ever learnt the truth about her sex life, might consider that she had been leading a double life.

But she says they'd be wrong. Her involvement in running one of Melbourne's best-known swingers' parties isn't a secret from her partner because he's involved too, so she's not deceiving anyone. She just doesn't divulge her sexual proclivities to her workmates.

''Sex is something that most people don't talk about to work colleagues, family and friends. It's not socially acceptable to do so - but everyone, pretty much, has sex. They aren't having a double life simply because they don't talk about it,'' the 55-year-old says.

''Swinging is called 'The Lifestyle' and that's how I see it in relation to myself and my boyfriend. It's just a part of our life.''

But she says some people in the swingers' community are certainly leading double lives.

''Quite often, when guys ring to make a booking, they will openly say they are married and quip that they will have to find a reason to be out on a Saturday night.''

The most common reason men give for cheating is ''that they either get no, or very little, sex at home''.

''Of course, there is potential for a negative impact if their actions are discovered by their partners but they obviously feel the need for sex is worth the risk - and that they will be able to get away with it,'' says Lilah.

''I don't get the impression that there is much guilt attached to their actions, though, especially for those who have been doing this long-term.''

I hope you enjoyed this article. It does provide a bit of insight into what some might consider double lives.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Sex Position of the Day...

2010-03-02T04:37:00.000-05:00

Try a new position tonight.... Try The Wow-Him Powwow!

Sit your man down with his legs crossed. Phacing him, straddle his legs and lower yourself into his lap — without him penetrating you. (I know, I know, hard to do but TRUST me!) Wrap your legs around his torso, so they’re hugging his butt. Then, as you hold each other’s arms or lower backs tightly, he enters you. Start to slowly rock back and forth together, increasing your speed as you come closer to climaxing.

Like the standard missionary position, this takes eye contact and body-to-body closeness to the max but adds a passion perk. The comfy upright pose encourages equal control over the speed and timing of his thrusting, allowing phor a gradual buildup of pleasure phor both partners. Plus, your clitoris is at an easy-to-reach angle, allowing him to stroke your love button without interrupting the hot-and-heavy action.

Exxxtra Credit:

Vary your rocking to prolong the pleasure. You can grind into each other slowly, then suddenly speed up or get deep, then tease each other with shallow penetrations. Get creative — you never know what combo will wow you both to bliss.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-02T04:21:00.000-05:00

Is the sexy voiced Chico DeBarge with - "No Guarantee". This is definitely one of those songs that when it comes on you AUTOMATICALLY pheel sexier. Hells you can put the whole album on and sex your man, you will get NO complaints phrom him. There is something about Chico's voice that just gets Starrphuk's engines running! Hell he can't help it, he is descended phrom the legendary DeBarge phamily and their hits they had in the 80's.

Now if only Chico could grow about 5-6" (he is only 5' 9") and gain about 20-30lbs! He is sexy as heck but is too dang short and skinny. I would break him in half! HAHA! Of course he has those pheatures that Starrphuk LOVES so damn much..... Thick ass eyebrows, sexy expressive eyes, thick phull lips, (that I can see happily slurping and nibbling on Cleopatra), bald head. OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH You guys KNOW those are some of the things she goes GAGA over! *drools a la Homer Simpson!*

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day...

2010-03-01T23:59:00.003-05:00

Are you limber enough to do The Lusty Leg Lift?! I think not!! I myself am trying to stretch enough so I can do this with my boy toy!

Phace your partner, standing with your legs shoulder width apart. Take your left phoot and turn it out to the side while keeping your right one phacing phorward. Have him widen his stance, with his legs about three pheet apart, and then ask him to bend his knees ever-so-slightly. Wrap your arms around his neck and have him put his arms snugly around your lower back. Here’s where it gets a little tricky: Pull your right leg up and place your right phoot on his left shoulder, keeping your right knee bent. As he slowly enters you, ease into the vertical split by sliding your calf as phar up his left shoulder as you comfortably can.

There’s a reason guys are drawn to a kick line of cheerleaders: Phlexibility is h-o-t. Most men are so stiff, they think a knee bend is an Olympic pheat—so pull this one on him and he’ll worship you as a sex goddess who knows how to stretch sexual boundaries.

Exxxtra Credit:

Pressing your man up against a wall will help both of you keep your balance and phorce him to relinquish all power over to you. To him, there’s no bigger turn-on than a hot chick who’s not afraid to take charge and tell him what to do.

Starrphuk is one limber lady but she is a little afraid of this one! She shan't lie to you! :) I say try it, just know your limits. So if you think you can get your leg halfway up his arm, that is PHINE! Now if you think you have what it takes to move that leg up his arm, then by all means do so. Just remember to do some stretching to limber up. Nothing spoils the mood quicker than you breaking your hip!!! Besides you can always move your leg up and down his arm to have different levels of intensity. If you catch a cramp, you can just sit on the edge of a table, desk, or countertop and do the "Leg Lock" until it goes away. Yum!!!

Have a great NIGHT the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

La Reina is doing two parties for "Brooklyn's Finest"!!

2010-03-01T23:08:00.001-05:00

Come out and celebrate this momentous occasion as one of Brooklyn's own, Michael C. Martin has his screenplay made into a blockbuster major motion pheature!!

"Brooklyn's Finest" Starring Don Cheadle, Richard Gear, Wesley Snipes and Ethan Hawke. Directed by Antione Fuqua (The Replacement Killers, Training Day)

Ya girl will be hosting this wondrous night. It would be an honor to have you in attendance as we all toast a new emerging talent.

On Friday March 5th the day of the films release come back out and join us once again for the continuation of a celebration for this great screenplay on the Big Screen. I will be hosting this event as well.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-03-01T02:05:00.000-05:00

Is Pitbull and his lovely "Hotel Room Service"

I LOVE this little Cuban motherphuker!! I like to play this song and give a lapdance to whomever Starrphuk's victim at the time is ;-)

It lyrics like these that make me cream:

She like that phreaky stuff two in the O and one in the eye that kinky stuff/You nasty but I like your type and like T.I. says it's whatever you like/Bring your girl it's whatever tonight/Ya man just left I'm the plumber tonight/I check yo pipes "Oh you the healthy type"? Well here go some egg whites.

What?!?!?!?! LOL I love his ass! I hope ya'll enjoy Pitbull as much as I do! It helps that he is ALWAYS in a suit. Starrphuk is easily in love with a man who can dress properly. *Le Sigh*

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk of the Day

2010-03-01T01:39:00.000-05:00

Is none other than the Notorious K.I.M.

Starrphuk cares not what you all have to say. Kim is a bad bish. Even if she is lighter than she used to be and her phace is different. She is was and will always be the QUEEN BEE!! Her outfits, her rhymes, her collabos on photoshoots. Can YOU pick out the David LaChapelle photos? There is just something about Kim & David's work that makes me tingle!

Hope you all enjoyed my foray into the Starrphuk of the day!!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
The Notorious Starrphuk!

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-02-28T18:27:00.000-05:00

Is our very own Lil' Kim with "How many licks". Whom in her own right is a honorary Starrphuk with lyrics like these:

I've been a lot of places, seen a lot of faces/Ah hell I even fuck with different races/A white dude - his name was John/He had a Queen Bee Rules tattoo on his arm, uh/He asked me if I'd be his date for the prom/and he'd buy me a horse, a Porsche and a farm/Dan my nigga from Down South/Used to like me to spank him and cum in his mouth/And Tony he was Italian (Uh-huh)/And he didn't give a fuck (Uh-huh)/That's what I liked about him/He ate my pussy from dark till the mornin/Called his girl up and told her we was bonin/Puerto Rican papi, used to be a Deacon/But now he be sucking me off on the weekend/And this black dude I called King Kong/He had a big ass dick and a hurricane tongue

I mean DAMN! That chica is one hardcore bitch! This is why Lil' Kim will ALWAYS be a Starrphuk. Matter of fact I will make her the Starrphuk of the day in a new ongoing series entitled: Starrphuk of the Day!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

WAYS TO TURN DOWN UNWANTED MEN !!!! A phunny phor the day!

2010-02-27T04:05:00.000-05:00

HE : Can I buy you a drink?
SHE : Actually I'd rather have the money.

HE : I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
SHE : I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

HE : Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
SHE : Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

HE : How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE : I must've been given your share.

HE : Will you go out with me this Saturday?
SHE : Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

HE : Your face must turn a few heads.
SHE : And your face must turn a few stomachs.

HE : Go on ,don't be shy. Ask me out.
SHE : Okay, get out.

HE : I think I could make you very happy.
SHE : Why? Are you leaving?

HE : What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
SHE : Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

HE : Can I have your name?
SHE : Why? Don't you already have one?

HE : Shall we go see a movie?
SHE : I've already seen it.

HE : Where have you been all my life?
SHE : Hiding from you.

HE : Haven't I seen you some place before?
SHE : Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

HE : Is this seat empty?
SHE : Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

HE : So, what do you do for a living?
SHE : I'm a female impersonator.

HE : Hey baby, what's your sign?
SHE : Do not enter.

HE : Your body is like a temple.
SHE : Sorry, there are no services today.

HE : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
SHE : If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk's Q&A - Sex & Your Life.

2010-02-26T07:33:00.000-05:00

Starrphuk said she would be bringing you interviews and while we will be bringing you more in depth interviews on Sex and your life but phor our phirst one I decided to lob a softball. This weeks interview is with Jennifer Arias. A longtime Phriend & Archenemy. Although we have been getting along phabulously lately. She is one of my oldest phriends here in NYC.

1, Your phirst time, how was it and was Music playing? If so, what was it?

My first time did not really enjoy it, and no music.

2, How does sex influence your daily life? i.e. Music choices, phashion choices, makeup choices, etc.

Phor some reason becoming more sexual has made me pheel more alive, phearless, sexy. Sex is the the red bull in my life, as phar as music, phashion and make up I listen to Trey Songz put on my phuk'em dress and my phierce make up.

3, Does sex rule your life?

I need it everyday all day.

4, Do you use phood with sex?

Hell yeah I use phood with sex, phood and sex go together.

5, Your phirst "O". How was it, when was it?

My phirst O was weird cause I didn't know what was happening to me, but I know it phelt good and I wanted it to happen again.

We here at Starrphuk hope you enjoyed our phirst Q&A. We will be bringing you quite a phew more interviews that we hope will energize you into action! ;)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Voodoo Penis - A little phunny phor your day!

2010-02-26T07:16:00.001-05:00

THE VOODOO PENIS

A businessman was getting ready to go on a long business trip, so he thought he'd buy his wife something to keep her occupied. He went to a sex shop & explained his situation.

The man there said, "Well, I don't know that I have anything that will keep her occupied
phor so many weeks, except... the Voodoo Penis!"

The husband said "The what"? The man repeated " The Voodoo Penis" and pulled out what seemed to be an ordinary dildo. The husband laughed, and said, "It looks like a dildo!"

The man then pointed to the door and said, "Voodoo Penis, door!"; The penis rose out of its box, darted over to the door and started pounding the keyhole. The whole door shook wildly with vibrations, so much that a crack began to phorm down the middle. Then the man said "Voodoo Penis, return to box!" and the penis stopped & returned to the box.

The husband bought it. He took it home to his wife, and after the husband had been gone a phew days, the wife remembered the Voodoo Penis. She undressed, opened the box and said "Voodoo Penis, my crotch". The penis shot to her crotch. It was absolutely incredible. After three mind shattering orgasms, she became very exhausted and decided she'd had enough. She tried to pull it out, but it was stuck. Her husband had neglected to tell her how to turn it off. So she put her clothes on, got in her car and started phor the hospital.

On the way, another incredibly intense orgasm made her swerve over the road. A police officer saw this and immediately pulled her over. He asked for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink. Gasping and twitching, the woman said "I haven't had anything to drink officer. You see, I've got this Voodoo Penis thing stuck in my crotch and it won't stop screwing me..."
The officer smirked, looked at her phor a second, shook his head and replied, "Yeah right... Voodoo Penis, my ass...!"

The rest, as they say, is history ...............
HEHE

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Grown Folks Business

2010-02-26T06:57:00.000-05:00

Only grown pholks will understand this.... Just some things phloating around the old noggin phrom time to time.

In our quest phor happiness we must be sure that we don't settle phor a Playmate when the Universe has a Soulmate waiting phor us. Sometimes this is a hard distinction to make. Playmates are tricky. They are so much phun to be with that even the smartest of us will be phooled into thinking this has to be our Soulmate. Worse yet too many of us attempt to make a Soulmate out of a Playmate. The danger of this is that later, after years of playing, we will meet our Soulmate, but it may be too late. We may have already made a Lifemate of our Playmate and created life-long bonds (emotional, children, etc.).

Alternatively, we may have been hurt phrom playing so hard that we are in no shape ourselves to be anyone's anything. How can we distinguish between the One, and just another one? Phirst, we must be open with ourselves about who we really are and what our soul yearns phor. Only you and the Universe knows what is truly in your heart and mind. Only you know what will make you truly happy and whole. In order to phind your Soulmate you have to know you, phirst. You must be willing to listen to that inner voice. Moreover, is that voice telling you that the nerdy person you enjoy talking and sharing your thoughts with, could be him? What about that phriend who is always willing to go the extra mile phor you when no one else will. Oh no! He's too short or too tall, balding or too hairy, and on and on? Just too ordinary looking phor me.

Then there's that girl who makes you pheel so special when you're around her, but she doesn't match that ideal you have conjured in your head. She's too tall, not slender enough, not light or dark enough, not shapely enough, not attractive enough, and on and on. She just couldn't be phor me! Therefore, what if he or she doesn't look like Shemar Moore or Vivica Fox. Is he or she going to treat you like the jewel that you are?

Not only that, his or her soul and yours will commune in ways you never imagined possible! In order to heed that voice, we have to put on the back burner our own superficial thinking. Could it be that your inner desire is phor a truly genuine person with a good heart? If you enjoy playing, stay on the playground. There are plenty of Playmates out there to occupy your time. Nevertheless, don't spend too much time playing or you may play your life away. Eventually the playing loses it appeal and your soul begins to crave a deeper, more meaningful connection. Your soul begins to crave your Soul mate.

Never make someone a priority when all you are to him or her is an Option.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-02-26T06:36:00.000-05:00

And the selection is....... Deftones "Change"

I've watched you change into a fly/I looked away you were on fire/I watched a change in you/It's like you never/Had wings now you feel so alive

I've watched you change/I took you home/Set you on the glass/I pulled off your wings/Then I laughed/I watched a change in you/It's like you never had wings how you feel/So alive

OMFG I can't help it, Chino's damn voice is so PHUKING sexy, I have their entire discography and put it on and just go crazy. A very HOTTTTTTT phriend of mine put them on phor me one day when we were getting our phuk on very recently. Once those songs came on and Chino's voice phloated out phrom the speakers I was entranced. It was as if he was singing to me and I could do nothing but give up my body to him and let the notes play over my body as the boy toy was working my body over. I tell you guys, Starrphuk was a happy camper as Chino sang... Whew! Of course the phella had something to do with it! Enjoy the song!!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Sex Position of the Day...

2010-02-26T06:08:00.000-05:00

Can you do the Torrid Triangle?!?!

At first glance, you might think this is just the same routine missionary position with him on top and you on the bottom. But, of course, there's a secret Cosmo superlift twist! With you underneath him, ask him to get up on all fours. Then raise your pelvis up to meet his penis. Tell him he has to stay put as you start moving your fanny up and down to get frisky.

Don't be fooled by being on the bottom — you're definitely the one calling all the shots here. By lifting your pelvis, you're in charge of the speed and timing of every thrust — so move according to your wanton whims. What's more, as long as he obeys your stay-still orders, you also decide the depth of the penetration — the harder you push, the deeper he goes and the more you (both) moan.

Exxxtra Credit:

Take a moment and enjoy your power trip! Here's your chance to tease him mercilessly by thrusting only halfway onto him. This will concentrate all sensations on the supersensitive tip of his tool. Then, when he least expects it, take the plunge and go all the way for a surprise rush of pleasure.

This seems like it would be tons of phun! I believe Starrphuk shall try it and report back to you on it! I can't wait ;-)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Ya'll know it is TittyTuesday on Twitter right? NSFW!!!!

2010-02-23T20:15:00.000-05:00

Yes I said it, today is TittyTuesday! All the slores came outta the woodwork to show off those tatas! Now you all KNOW Starrphuk loves her some titties but I mean really?! It is one thing to take artful photos and the like, Starrphuk has taken plenty of said photos. I just don't go putting them all over the internet for the world to see. Maybe a gallery, not all over Twitter. I have nothing against these ladies at all. They wanna be all slore-y then let them. Makes me happy to see some tetas! I likey!! I hear tomorrow is AssWednesday. Let's see if it goes down!! If so I'll be one happy phuker!!! LMAO @ the last one trying to lick it.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La MuthaPhukin Reina

Starrphuk's Song of the day...

2010-02-23T16:53:00.000-05:00

Is none other than LL Cool J's "Doin' it".

Who doesn't love this damn song?! A great give and take between LL & LeShaun.

So what cha sayin, I get my swerve on, bring it live/Make it last forever, damn the kitty cat's tight

Mmm... daddy slow down your flow/Put it on me like G baby nice and slow/I need a rough neck nigga Mandingo in a sec/Who ain't afraid to pull my hair and spank me from the back

Doin' it and Doin' it and Doin' it well/Doin' it and Doin' it and Doin' it well./Doin' it and Doin' it and Doin' it well.
I represent Queens she was raised out in Brooklyn.

MMMMMM Yummie Yummie Yummie. I mean this is one of those songs you can give your lover a lap dance to. So damn sensual. WHEW!!!

But LeShaun is right, a roughneck with a big dick who can pull my hair and spank me phrom the back.... YUM-O Yes Starrphuk loves the slow and sensual lovin but there is nothing like some nice good hard sexing!!

Have a GREAT day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day...

2010-02-23T16:29:00.000-05:00

Ready to Romp With A View?!

Lie on your side on a sturdy surface (if you opt for the bed, make it first — the tangled sheets will only get in the way with this pose) with one arm propping up your head or bent under your body for support. Keeping one leg stretched out along the bed or floor, extend the other straight up in the air perpendicular to your body. Your partner can then straddle your grounded leg and enter you while holding your other leg up or letting it rest against his shoulder for leverage, whichever happens to satisfy his passion preference.

With your leg against his bod, your man can use it to leverage himself into the hottest pose possible. And he can penetrate you in up-and-down motions instead of regular back-and-forth thrusting. The different strokes will bring on ultrasensual new sensations.

Exxxtra Credit:

With your free hand, reach up and run your fingers across his chest as you gaze longingly into his eyes. Then, slowly, carefully stroke his nipples which is a major turn-on for lots of guys. (Cosmo magazine is hilarious!!!)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-02-22T22:34:00.001-05:00

Is Jay-Z's "Ain't no nigga". I tell you once the beat dropped, and the vocals came in you KNEW this song was a CLASSIC! Of course it is a good song to dance to and hey if it comes on while ya phuking, it works!!

I keeps ya phresher tha the next bitch/no need phor you to ever sweat the next bitch/with speed I make the best bitch see the exit indeed/You gotta know you thoroughly respected by me/Ya get the keys to the Lexus, but no drivin/Ya got ya own 96 something to ride in/Keep ya ass tight up in Versace/Thats why you got to watch ya phriends ya got to watch me/They conniving shit the phirst chance they get to crack the bank/they try me all they get is 50 cent phranks/at Papayas phrom the village to the telle/time to kill it on your belly/no question I got more black chicks between my sheets than Essence/they say sex is a weapon so when I shoot meet ya death in less than 8 seconds/still pounding in the afterlife/laughin my shit is tight who you askin right?

Ain't no nigga like the one I got/No one can phuk you better/Sleeps around but he gives me a lot/keeps me in diamonds and leathers/phriends are telling me I should leave him alone/(hahahahaha)tell the phreaks to phind a man of they own (a man of they own)!

This song is the ISH!!! Still to this day!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)
La Reina

Bathography that is NSFW

2010-02-22T11:59:00.000-05:00

Well hello there sexy! This set of photographs are absolutely STUNNING. I mean this girl gives good phace. As well as taking a great set of pictures. Sexy as PHUK with the small breasts. Ya'll know that is what Starrphuk prefers as she has MORE than enough to go around phor everyone! Take a look and tell me what you think!

According to TrendHunter:

The Anja Rubik Last Magazine spread is sure to raise the temperature of any viewers. The sultry model scorches up in front of the camera lens and getting clean has never look so naughty. Shot by talented photographer Camila Akrans, she proves that she can take stunning photos with very little to work with. With only a bare backdrop, an old porcelain tub and melting bubbles, Camila Akrans and Anja Rubik make bathtub magic for the camera.

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Pole Dancing in the Olympics?

2010-02-22T11:21:00.000-05:00

Starrphuk would be a happy camper if they were to have this in the Olympics. If they have it phor ladies, would men be participating as well? She is not to thrilled at the prospect of seeing men pole dancing. EWWWWWW *shudders* Imagine the outfits they would wear?! No thank you!

According to Newser:

The thrill of the libido, the agony of panty rashes may soon be a new highlight of the Olympics if pole dancers have their way and make the acrobatic gyrations an Olympic event. Others are hardly convinced, but the founder of the International Pole Dancing Fitness Association believes Olympic recognition is merely a matter of time. Pole dancing takes just as much work and skill as, say, tug of war, which was once an Olympic event. Besides, pole dancing has the "wow factor," one practitioner tells AP.

Well lets see how this turns out. Starrphuk will let you know how this all plays out!

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Technorati Claim

2010-02-22T06:40:00.000-05:00

WQ22PBCMMMJ7

Have a great day the Starrphuk way:)!
La Reina

STD Boozevertising

2010-02-22T04:48:00.000-05:00

Well here we are. Phinally someone is trying to push the correlation between drinking and STD's. I mean it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that if you drink to much you can slip up and get slipped in by an unwrapped dick. I hope these ads come to this side of the pond!

According to TrendHunter:

Derek Bowers’ safe sex campaign for the UK uses doctored liquor bottles to illustrate the connection between a night of drinking and sexually transmitted diseases. In the first image, for example, a bottle of Smirnoff becomes Chlamydia; in another, a bottle of Jack Daniels becomes Pubic Lice.
I love the shock art approach Derek Bowers has used for this safe sex campaign. Let’s hope it holds water in the UK.

My brief was to create a government campaign to promote safe sex and link it to the alarming rise in sexually transmitted infection cases in the UK. The direction of the brief was totally upto myself, but the project was not to come across as smutty or tacky and I wasn't to try and get that 'shock factor.' I used the different alcohol bottles after research the links between STI's and one night stands down to excessive drinking. (behance.net)

Have a great day the starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Sex Position of the Day...

2010-02-22T02:11:00.002-05:00

Ohhhhh it's the Magic Mountain!!!!

Grab as many pillows as possible and arrange them on the phloor, and phall down on top of them phollowing it's shape so your body naturally arches. Have your man lie down on top of you phacing the same direction with his chest riveted to your back his arms over yours. Using the pillows as a crutch poen theose legs up so he can kneel between them and slide right in you!

The reason you'll love it:

You get to do it doggie (which is Starrphuk's FAVORITE!) with the thrill of that, and it is a position every lover boy goes gaga for, but with supersoft support for you both. With all that padding beneath you, he can go all-out wild with the thrusting. And unlike most backside boinks, his whole upper body is one with yours, giving intimacy addicts ultrasensual head-to-toe connection. Focus on this skin-to-skin contact to add yet another sensation to the mix.

Exxxtra Credit:

Switch around your body positions to have even more fun on the mountain of lust. Climb a little higher so that he's almost lying on top of you for a while, then descend a bit so you're practically sitting in his lap. Each tweak will give you something new to moan about.

Starrphuk can say she loves to play with this one. You can move and wiggle around and clap your ass. Phor those of you who do NOT know how to clap your ass, well let me break it down. ;) All you have to do is squeeze your butt repeatedly over and over and try to make it go in a circle as you do it. Try doing it while you are at home alone to get the hang of it. If you have a smaller ass, it is cool, you will make it bigger by constantly making it clap/shake. (That is what happened phor Starrphuk, she had noassitol and started making it jump while lying in bed and has continued to do so for over ten years. Now she has a NICE juicy ass that men love. As does she.)

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina

Starrphuk's song of the day...

2010-02-21T23:16:00.000-05:00

Is the Deftones cover of The Cure's "If only tonight we could sleep". Either version I love; there is just something about Chino's voice that has me mesmerized.

If only tonight we could sleep/In a bed made of flowers/If only tonight we could fall/In a deathless spell
If only tonight we could slide/Into deep black water/And breathe/And breathe...

Have a great day the Starrphuk way:)!
La Reina

Durex Typeface Condom Ads

2010-02-21T22:50:00.001-05:00

MMMM! Starrphuk likey! These ads are very intriguing. I certainly think you need to keep things interesting when advertising protection. How HOTTTTT! I hope to see these in the subway tunnels of NYC

According to TrendHunter:

Durex Condom’s latest ad campaign will definitely have heads turning. Their attention-grabbing images feature a couple in some very compromising positions; however, the images are created out of an array of words.
The Durex typeface ads are complied of words such as ‘overload,’ ‘numb,’ ‘muscle tension,’ and ‘brain.’ Although, ‘brain’ is not exactly where you might expect it. The actual condom is displayed (while in use) in bright blue letters that spell out ‘Durex.’

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!
La Reina

Scotty Lago kicked out of Olympics?!

2010-02-21T16:31:00.001-05:00

Because of a photograph?!!?!?? Are you phuking serious?! Because it looked a LITTLE like like she was kissing his cock?! GTFOHWTBS!!! It is obvious he has the medal around his waist and THAT is what she was kissing. Ah man, I tell you this whole PC thing is just WAY outta hand. If that was what the woman wanted to do while getting her picture taken, well LET HER! I mean it is all in good phun. Sex is a part of life. And while this pic is "racy" it is not like she is actually sucking him off!! If someone wants to look like an asshole well let them. They are both adults. To kick the man out of the Olympics because of a picture... YOU ARE DUMB. Just because of the Michael Phelps picture now every one is so damn sensitive.

What do YOU think?

Have a great day the Starrphuk way;)!

La Reina